Hey Folks!

I’ve been living abroad for over half my life in a country where tipping is not the norm. At most you would round up. 19€ bill? Here’s a 20, keep this change.

Going to the US soon to visit family and the whole idea of tipping makes me nervous. It seems there’s a lot of discussion about getting rid of tipping, but I don’t know how much has changed in this regard.

The system seems ridiculously unfair, and that extra expense in a country where everything is already so expensive really makes a difference.

So will AITA if I don’t tip? Is it really my personal responsibility to make sure my server is paid enough?

  • circuitfarmer@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 year ago

    I’d say yes. The situation is complex.

    It’s clear that tipping culture is out of control. There are many places asking for 20% tips even when ordering from a counter where the interaction takes about 10 seconds.

    Unfortunately there has also been a systematic underpayment of wages which has occurred largely on the back of tips. In some states it is even legal to pay less than minimum wage and supplement that with tips. For that reason, it’s not really an option to simply not tip without being the bad guy.

    Certainly the system needs to change, but as of this moment in the US, just assume everything actually costs 20% more and tip.

    • BrainisfineIthink@lemmy.one
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      1 year ago

      it’s not really an option to simply not tip without being the bad guy

      My man you have got to shake this from your psyche, that’s exactly how the employers that aren’t paying their employees want you to feel. You’re offloading their greed and systematic exploitation of working class people onto yourself under the misplaced guise of personal guilt. There may not a way to immediately fix the problem, but I can guarantee it will never get fixed if we dont change anything.

      • MedicareForSome@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        In some cases we’re talking about people making $2.13 an hour in a country where you’re easily paying $1,000 a month or even more for a studio apartment. I’d say if you don’t tip you’re the bad guy.

        This type of change isn’t going to come from people just deciding that waitstaff should starve and refusing to tip. If anything it will come from unionization of waitstaff or from legislation.

        • TWeaK@lemm.ee
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          1 year ago

          No, the bad guy is still the employer, and the culture that exploits both employees and customers and pits them against one another.

          Meals in the US are not cheaper than meals in other countries. The menu price is roughly the same. Meals plus tips in the US cost significantly more than meals in other countries.

          However staff generally benefit from this arrangement. Places that have trialed better wages and no tips have found that staff make less than what they did if they got tips. So only the customer actually wants a fair deal out of it, and everyone else isn’t willing to change.

        • Arcaneslime@lemmy.ml
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          1 year ago

          He’s suggesting “fuck the worker, it isn’t my problem if they can’t pay rent, they should learn to code.” And somehow that will make the business owner pay them a fair wage and not replace them with a machine or a 16yo kid.

    • duncesplayed@lemmy.one
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      1 year ago

      just assume everything actually costs 20% more and tip.

      And by “everything”, you mean “not actually everything, but you’d need a 400 page manual to describe what gets tipped and what doesn’t”.

    • TWeaK@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      In most states it’s legal to pay less than minimum wage (literally around $2 per hour) for workers who get tips.

      One issue is that workers generally make more money off tips than if they just got minimum wage. So it’s not just employers that are unwilling to change.

      • mintyfrog@lemmy.ml
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        1 year ago

        It’s only legal if their tips exceed the minimum wage. Whether or not the employee would ask for the difference over fear of retaliation is another story