Will this picture from my kitchen suffice? Now how about some counterarguments to my terrible points?

You make some big assumptions about my politics here. Believe me, I’ve got plenty of ‘distress’ for employers. None of this changes the fact that if you know that service workers are grievously exploited and you choose to have them wait on you while not compensating them, then you are also committing an immoral act. You and the employer then have something in common: you both know that the worker ought to be compensated fairly for their work, and you’re both refusing to do it.

Am I absolved of sin when buying clothing that I know is produced in a sweatshop because ‘well, the employer really ought to improve working conditions, but that’s not my problem’?

The employer first exploited the worker, then you went in, benefited from their labor for free, directly reducing their income, supporting the business that exploits them while not supporting the worker, and somehow, your hands are clean?

You could choose to simply not give businesses who don’t fairly compensate their workers your money, but instead, you give them the cost of your dinner and reduce your server’s hourly wage?

If people want to reject tipping culture, they need to reject businesses that practice it, not fund them.

Ah. So to be clear, you would deny someone needed resources because of their attitude?

Agreed. They shouldn’t have to, but surely we can agree that if you’re going out to have a nice time, made possible by someone who you know to be greviously exploited, that it would be cruel and unfair to deny them their only real source of income? Under those conditions, surely going to a restaurant at all is immoral unless you exchange the worker’s labor appropriately, whether or not this obligation should befall you in an ideal world? Surely we can agree that in that moment, you are the one who decides if that worker will receive the income they need for food, clothing, healthcare, and housing, and if you will not provide it in return for your evening of leisure, it would have been better if you had stayed home and allowed that table to be occupied by someone who would choose to fairly compensate that worker?

That’s great! I assume, then, that this means you wouldn’t deny a service worker needed resources because you thought they were a little grumpy?

if you knowingly go to a restaurant where your waiter requires tips to make a living wage, and you don’t, you are most certainly AH

…was the full quote. Even if we accept that this is ad hominem, you would have to engage in the described behavior for it to be so, which certainly doesn’t hurt their argument that you implied people shouldn’t tip.

By law, yes, but most restaurants simply do not care. Wage theft is extremely common.

Fallacy fallacy. No ad hominem here.

Yes. Unless there’s clearly bigotry of some kind behind the behavior, yes. You never know what someone might be dealing with. They could have been denied that day off to attend a funeral for a family member (which absolutely happens in that industry), or they could just be completely burned out and unable to perform the emotional labor and / or masking to appear kind and respectful any more. I’ve been there personally. I’ve also had situations where guests thought I was being rude, when there was just a culture difference and I was trying to communicate. I’ve almost lost my job because I wouldn’t give a customer free product. My “no” was interpreted as rude because I was completely burned out from working 12+ hours straight that day, with no overtime pay, and just couldn’t fake a smile anymore. As a result, unless someone is being openly homophobic, etc, I never tip less than 20%, because my feelings and read on the situation shouldn’t impact someone’s ability to feed themselves.

Have you worked in the industry? This happens!

When I lived in Texas, “Canadian” was used as a racist term to refer to Black guests, while implying that they weren’t likely to tip. It was pretty horrible.

It is strongly implied until the last paragraph, where you advocate tipping as little as possible if you don’t like their attitude. Horrible, cruel take.

Yep, 20% is minimum these days. And if you’re at a nice cocktail bar, it’s customary to do a min 20% tip on your bill rather than a per-drink tip. Also worth noting that the wage paid by employers to waitstaff and bartenders usually disappears into taxes, and wage theft and refusal to pay overtime is common. People often have to give a percentage of their total sales to bussers and barbacks; this is called a tip-out, and it isn’t reduced if tips are low. If a server has a really bad day with low tips, they can literally wind up losing money.

To those who don’t tip in protest, you’re not helping. Employers do not care. If they even notice, they’re likely to just assume the server is bad at their job and ‘discipline’ them, and / or move them to a worse shift where they will earn less. All you’re doing is forcing someone to work for you, for free, in a hellscape working environment, so that you can have a nice time. By doing this, you are making someone’s life tangibly worse.

I’ve spent years in the US service industry at all levels; if you’ve never spent significant time in the industry, however bad you think it is, it’s worse. Every job I’ve held in the hospitality industry has easily been more physically, mentally, and emotionally taxing than any professional role I’ve had.

Same here. Librewolf is great.